~fairyPrincess~

Aloha!!!

to those yg tak tau lg…i’m already here in Malaysia..been here since mid-june..lama dah tuh..tapi tak ramai yg tau..

nape ek?

sebab..sebab..alah, saje je tak nak glamer!..hehehe!…sape nak keychain hawaii tuh..silalah bgtau..nanti insya-allah i’ll pass it to you..kalo ada lg lah ;p..tp sape nak t-shirt tuh..mintak maaflah..my dad dah ’sapu’ abis..dia ingat sume dia nyer..huhuhu..i think tercampur ngan dia punya skali time my mom helped me packed my stuff dulu

so buat apa skrang?

ermm…ermmm…dah abis my bachelor last year…so skrang pe lagi…cari keje lah,kan?kan?..hari tuh baru je habiskan proses ‘mencantikkan’ resume..i’ve sent to couple of places..hopefully they’ll call me for an interview *crossing my fingers n pray to god* besides that, kadang2 buat research sikit2 cari courses & unversities for my masters…haaa…problem gak nih..tak tau nak amik course ape..my options skrang

1) children’s literature 2) english in literary studies 3) early childhood education 4) communication 5) library science-ini tak brape sgt lah

tak pe..tak pe..for now i take things slowly…kang bole migrain lak kalo asyik fikir sgt..well,actually dah penah jd dah..huhuhu! ADOIII! for now i must look for a job first..insya-allah bila dah keje then i can only decide..lagipun..funding tak de lagi, IELTS tak amik lg,etc lah..so paling awal pun kalo nak sambung master maybe 2009

kat mane skrang nih?

hehehe…mana lagi..kat melaka lah..my primary home..kadang2 je kat KL..secondary home..tuh pun kalo ade hal

kalo nak tengok my pictures..bole go to this page

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sumishaidin/

let me know if you can’t access it

lastly, humuhumunukunukua’pua!

p/s not a greeting..hehehe..but the name of hawaii’s state fish..some of my friends like that word!

tup..tap..tup..tap..Rupa-rupanya ari ni da genap 2 bulan aku kat Honolulu ni. To be exact, 9 weeks kat bumi Amerika nih. Cam tak caya je. Huhuhu..I bet nobody (even me!!) would ever imagine that someday me,Sumi Shaidin has the opportunity of the lifetime to be outside from Malaysia.

    Ermmm……it all started when I glanced at a paper that H was holding while me and a few of my classmates were all having our break in between classes at cafe. It was an ad about Fulbright’s Foreign Language Teaching Assistant. The deal looked so cool to me but I was kindda hesitated to apply. "Am I qualified enough? It’s only for the brainy, not an average person like me"…K.M and H applied for it and they encouraged me to just give it a shot. So I was like "what the heck,I should just try my luck.No harm on doing that". Others weren’t really interested since it was a non-degree program. Some thought it wasn’t really worth it. In the end us trio applied for it but unfortunately K.M. reluctantly had to withdraw hers due to some personal problems. Aku pun sedih gak!! Tak pe Kak, soon there will be something much more wonderfull coming to you after this!!!
    Well, that was not the real reason I applied for this. What triggered me to apply is when H said that "he wants to get out from this country for awhile"(something like that la). I don’t know why but it surely made me think of the same thing. Sure, why not? Aside from getting new and totally different teaching experience plus the opportunity to stay in foreign country, I also want to do the same thing as H wants to do. To tell the truth,this is like a one perfect chance to ‘ran away from my painful past’. Yeah..I know that sounds coward but that was the only thing I could do after being stomped hard twice in a row(in the same year,damn!). I need to escape from those horrible giants. Sounds melodramatic to you? Yup..Sumi can be vulnerable and stupid more than you can imagine.
    And here I am. Nak sangat lari..hah ambik ko! kena campak kat Hawaii!! Padan Muka!! That was my first thought when I received the email from MACEE. HAHAHA!!! Tapi tak pe laa….although kindda terkilan tak dapat pegi mainland I slowly starting to like this place. This university is the best place to study humanities courses especially on foreign languages. My circle is mostly from either East West Center Scholarship groupie or from Center of Southeast Asian Studies groupie. They are aware our Asian cultures and very interested with it. Asianist pun ramai kat sini. Tak rasa pun cam kat US. Tapi kalo nak tau Malaysia tak sefeymes as other Southeast countries. Paling kurang disebutkanlah senang citer compared to Indonesia, Singapore,Thailand,etc..Dunno why…
    During the two whole months here is like …..dunno how to describe it. I was dissapointed that the promotion on Malay language class was done only after I arrived. My supervisor should have done it long before I come. Not after I’m here and all students have already registered their subjects. Hey, he already that knew I’m gonna be here since Mac! No fair…then I"M the one yang kena tampal poster around the campus.No big deal actually but it was already too late!! Another thing, I don’t have enough resources to teach not even a textbook! Dah la tak penah ajar BM (tue tak kisahla sangat). Everything has to be initiate by me; syllabus,teaching material (slalu cilok dr indonesian text book plus my own knowledge) and lesson plan(ini tak kisah gak coz memang kena buat sendiri) I also couldn’t find a decent and proper Malay textbook. When i finally do (well,sort of) it was absolutely rubbish!! kena tipu bulat2! Entahla apa yang that so-called local Malay Linguist tuh pikir masa tulis buku tuh. Banyak benda yang not taken in consideration. Terlalu susah untuk foreign speaker..Sabar Sumi, bawakla banyak-banyak bersabar!!! Dugaan..banyak la lagi kisah selanjutnya tapi kalo tulis sumer nanti orang kate mengada-ngada lak. Sumer mende nak complain. Bukan complain cuma luahan hati je…hehehe!! After all, this is my blog,kan.

Waikiki Beach

2 more weeks to go…to b exact..another 12 more days!!! Ya Allah, i’m sooo nervous..hard to describe how much is it..but that’s all i can say right now..my heart beats much faster..faster than usual..my mind is kindda blank..trying soo hard to do things that i’ve have to…sometimes doing things that i’ve never think i would do it…
    for those who doesn’t know yet…i’m going to Hawaii for 9 months as a Foreign Language Teaching Assistant (FLTA). i’m going to teach BM there..It’s hard to believe but true!! HAHAHA!! mana x nyer…5 thn blaja TESL tp ajar BM lak…but simple BM laa…it’s like u r learning ur 3rd language here..but still…i’m not really familiar with the tatabahasa..
    WHAT’S MORE…i’m going there alone!!! this is a mega, huge new challenge for me..yea arr..aku mane penah duk oversea sorg2..at least kalo ade member m’sa kat sana Insya Allah x la rase lonely sgt…
    so much to do…so little time…lot’s of preparation to be done….i’ve settled stuff like visa & other documents. still haven’t settled stuff like books,clothes & food…i plan to pack light (b’coz blk m’sia sure brg byk nyer..hehehe) i wish i can accomplish that..(girls…so many items to bring!!)

to be continued…

wake up in the morning…blur jap…academic exercise..blur lg..what is my plan for today…academic execise…jump from my bed…take shower , solat n prepare myself for class (no matter what time it is)…academic exercise again…classes…tests…quizzes…assignments….academic exercise…eat when i’m hungry and also when i’m not really hungry but just wanna munch something…academic exercise….listen to my favourite songs while doing my work….napping around (in class as well when i can’t help it!)…..academic exercise again….academic exercise…academic exercise…when the hell am i going to finish my academic exercise project?!!!! finally having my own solitary but sometimes disturbed beauty sleep…

ok….here there are…presenting my new year resolution….

1. no more evening nap (susah skit nih kalo da penin kapla gue)

2. wake up early (pun sama gak)

3. go 2 class early (insya allah bole!)

4. finish all my assignments on time (wei,da final sem…tlg la insaf!) hehehe

5. not romantically involve in any relationship (temporarily…muhahaha!) serik wei..abis kantoi exam result aku

6. berjimat cermat (amalan kita!)

7. MOST IMPORTANTLY….berhijrah 2 b a better person..yeyer!

attention 2 all my frens and family members out there!! i wish that all of u will support me in every way so that i can make all my resolution come true…onegaishimasu!

p/s: this entry will b edited from time 2 time… :>

yesterday i received the most shocking news in my entire life….i was sooo definitely surprised, sad, angry (well, a bit laa. plz don’t blame me). a fews ago somehow i confessed that i still have feeling for him eventhough we broke up 3 years ago…so did he..but the shocking truth that i learnt about him makes me realized that there’s no point of pursuing this…i’m soo sorry..n mayb in the future we couldn’t even b frens like we used to b after we broke up! this is so devastated to me..but as what people say…life must goes on…even without him…must b brave!..must b strong! (elele…entah pape la aku nih!)

this song below is another one of my favorite songs…i like the music arrangement..it’s like listening to an orchestra…what makes me really, really like this song is the lyric..somehow it matches with my situation right now.i’m sure u guys are familiar with kiroro…she is famous with her songs such as  mirae n best fren..

sayonara daisukina hito by kiroro

sayonara daisukina hito 2x

mada daisukina hito

kuyashi wo tottemo

kanashi wo tottemo

mou kaette konai

soredemo watashi no daisukina hito

nanimo kamo wasurerarenai

nanimo kamo sutekirenai

konna jibun ga mijimete yowakute kawaiso de daikirai

sayonara daisukina hito 2x

zutto daisukina hito

nakaiyo ima wa

nakaide ima wa

kokoro hanarete yuku

soredemo watashino daisukina hito

saigo dato ii kikasete

saigo made ii kikasete

namida wo tomare saigo ni egao wo oboete oku tame

sayonara daisukina hito

zutto daisukina hito

which roughly translates like this.. (thanks 2 my translator, my dear cousin malek. what would i do without u dear!)

bye bye org yg plg saya suka 2x

sekarang pun masih suka…

sedih2 pun, tak bole patah balik…

begitu juga, mengenai org yg plg saya suka

everything pun tak bole lupa

everything pun tak dpt "dibuang" (kenangan?)

diri yg camni membuatkan diri jadi lemah, tak sukanya (diri yg lemah tu)

bye bye2 org yg saya plg suka 2x

selamanya,…org yg plg saya suka

selama lama nya org yg plg saya suka

sekarang, jangan nangis

hati sedang menjauh

begitu juga org yg plg saya suka (sedang menjauh)

sampai saat terakhir pun, tolong la kata..

berhenti la airmatamu, senyum la, sebagai kenangan

bye bye org yg plg saya suka

selamanye org yg plg saya suka

selama lamanya org yg plg saya suka

i dedicate this song to u coz as u once said that this is our theme…it currently reflects our situation right now..

sayonara daisukina hito!

last thursday i went 2 watch king kong with my 2 lil brothers n my gurlfren,liana. mulanya nak tgk narnia but since liana dah tgk we decided 2 watch king kong je laa..cam reluctant je mula2 tp tgk je laa..ingatkan x best but it was ok…i kindda like it! as i watched it cam teringat-ingat skit arr original movie die…but not all arr..yg klakarnya me n liana tgk penuh perasaan.siap pegang2 tgn (mase scene natives tuh,takut konon!),gelak2 although that wasn’t funny e.g. kong fought with the dinosaurs to save miss darrow (hehehe),terjerit skali-skale,kutuk-mengutuk..etc. but overall, us foursome had goodtime together.

i came across with an article from the star…x barape ingat sgt  content die…it mentioned that this movie got the highest rating compared to narnia n harry potter n LOTR here in malaysia but vice versa in USA and UK. the author said mayb because most malaysian doesn’t really like to read so they don’t really familiar with those three movies..well..mayb it’s true..plus we r familar with king kong coz it’s a remake from the 1930’s original movie..it’s an action movie so x yah la pk teruk2 sgt nak paham citernyer…but i’m so touched with the emotional relationship between miss darrow n kong (their facial expressions n gestures say it all)…

i like carl denham’s line…"it’s not the bullet that kills the beast but the beauty". it’s shows that even that most monstrous creature in the entire universe has a soft spot in its heart n don’t jugde people from their physical appearance…a few lessons that i learnt on that day!

this song is now becoming more n more popular now. i think u guys may heard of this song before…i like it sooo much coz somehow it related to me especially the last lines that i highlighted below..it explains the feeling that i have rite now…somebody help me!!

You’re Beautiful-James Blunt

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I’m sure.

She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won’t lose no sleep on that,
‘Cause I’ve got a plan.

You’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.
You’re beautiful, it’s true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don’t know what to do,
‘Cause I’ll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
F*cking high,
And I don’t think that I’ll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.
You’re beautiful, it’s true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don’t know what to do,
‘Cause I’ll never be with you.
You’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.
You’re beautiful, it’s true.

There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it’s time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

p/s what do u guys think?

i just finished my practicum 2 weeks ago.can’t believe that i finally get thru this.the truth is..call it weird, or lier or whatever u want to say..but I MISS MY STUDENTS!!! heheehe.i miss their jokes,their attempt to gain my attention(hehehe.am i THAt popular?),their smiles n even their sour faces when i scolded them.i learnt a lot from them…tell u later laaa…BUT…do they miss me?

there’s r so many things happen to me lately…but i’m too lazy to write. i know writing can help u to learn how to express urself. sometimes i have a lot of stuff in my mind but i can’t seem to find myself to jot it down. pathetic,rite? even more pathetic is that i’m a TESL student. a TESLian should do all this stuff..i mean writing,reading in english laa…Hermphhhh….i guess i should change my bad habit as well as my not so godd attitude..